from Chris Snelgrove
| Published
The other day I decided to watch it again Freddy vs. Jasonso unpleasant that it’s a good match of discontent between the most famous faces in horror. I’m usually a digital guy, but in order to watch the fight (which was infinitely more entertaining than the Mike Tyson vs. Logan Paul fight), I had to make Tommy Jarvis and start digging. I dug up physical media rather than Jason’s corpse for a very surprising reason: as of this writing, Freddy vs. Jason not found anywhere on streaming.
Part of what makes this so remarkable is that Freddy vs. Jason was perhaps the most hyped horror film in history that the respective studios have been trying to make since the 1980s. Before it came out, fans spent decades imagining how the fight between these two killers would play out. It was the horror equivalent of nerds debating whether Kirk or Picard was better Star Trek captain. Now, the funniest horror fight is nowhere to be streamed, and that’s a shame, because the movie is the perfect embodiment of insane fun.
It’s unclear exactly why Freddy vs. Jason is not streaming right now… it was available on Max about a month ago and may just not be available until the rights holders figure out where to shop it. Also, it may have had a window of time to stream Max for October before disappearing back into our dreams after the ghost month ended. Regardless of the exact reason, it’s a shame this movie isn’t airing because it has a lot of good qualities, including a killer cast.
The cast of Freddy vs. Jason kills, especially Nightmare on Elm Street veteran Robert Englund reprises his role as Freddy Krueger. Ken Kerzinger plays Jason Voorhees, and while I miss Kane Hodder’s portrayal of the world’s meanest goalie, Kerzinger lends the character some nicely dark gravitas as a counterbalance to Englund’s wild humor. The cast of victims is just as fun and includes surprisingly big names like Kelly Rowland (best known as part of Destiny’s Child) and Kathryn Isabelle (best known to horror fans as scream queen star of Ginger Snaps).
Freddy vs. Jason similarly killed at the box office, earning $116.6 million on a budget of just $30 million. That’s a much better return than New Line Cinema saw Wes Craven’s new nightmare (which grossed $19.8 million against an $8 million budget) or Jason X (which earned $17.1 million against a budget of $11-14 million). Critically, it was more of a dud, earning an abysmal critical rating of 41 percent, with critics generally noting that the film was enjoyable for fans of the respective franchises, but not so much for the general public.
It’s a fair criticism, but I can’t help but wonder who appears on a film called Freddy vs. Jason not caring about the titular fighters. That would be like watching Batman against Superman not interested in superheroes or tuning in Godzilla v. Cong not interested in fighting a kaiju. And assuming you, like me, have spent decades enjoying both characters, you’ll find plenty to fall in love with Freddy vs. Jasona film that is simply better than most of the later entries in any franchise.
For example, the story where Freddy uses Jason as a cat’s paw to get the children of Springwood to remember him is surprisingly clever. This revolves around another clever plot involving Springwood isolating anyone who has been exposed to Freddy and giving them a drug to prevent them from sleeping. Personally, I’m sad about big reveals about how familiar the general public is with a mystical killer like Freddy, and it’s rewarding to see them take practical steps to effectively isolate him from his dreamscape home turf.
As long as you don’t mind the nervous camerawork (like what you’d see in an early music video), the final fight between Freddy and Jason is pretty funny. Not content to rely solely on each other’s cutting tools, the two make clever use of their environment, even as the teenagers take advantage of their respective fears (the film introduces a really confusing idea that Jason has a phobia of water and Freddy has a phobia of fire). It’s a knock-down, drag-and-drop battle that delivers everything you want from a horror showdown decades in the making, and it’s sure to have you grinning through the credits.
Freddy vs. Jason is an imperfect film, but that doesn’t stop it from providing perfect entertainment if you’re in the mood for the ultimate love letter to 80s horror. Not available on streaming anywhere, but I highly recommend tracking down the physical media. Of course, you can always wait and watch the whole thing in your dreams, but be warned: after this kinky year, Freddy has plenty more nightmares to chase before he comes for yours.
